Fantastic fall

I love fall!

Look at my little princess enjoying the spoils of fall!

She loved painting her pumpkin, 

eating pumpkin cupcakes, 

laughing with her brother and sisters,

drinking hot chocolate... 

There is just nothing better than making fall memories :)

tupid continues

(momma and baby lion)

I ALWAYS ask Kid5 what the names of her animals and babies are. I love it when kids start naming their babies and animals. (with the exception of Kid4 who named all her animals lindsay or brittany). 

Kid5 and I were on our way out the door to go grocery shopping and she ran back in and grabbed her tiger. I said "Oh! I love that tiger! What is her name? And she replied "tupid".... seriously? Can she NOT forget that I said that? 

I decide that it's not always necessary to point out what she shouldn't say since it usually encourages her to say it LOTS more. I just ignored it and loaded her up in the car. Off to get groceries we go. 

Fast forward to a few minutes later, we're at the store. People ALWAYS talk to Kid5. She is very friendly and never meets a stranger. She is loved by all strangers, seriously! 

stranger- Oh hi little cutie!

Kid5- Wook at my tigew!

stranger- oh look at that tiger! whats your tigers name?

**insert panic here**

Kid5- ...two......

**thank goodness, she think she asked how old she was.... whew.......**

stranger- two?

Kid5- Tigew name tupid!

stranger- ..... uh.... uh.....?

Now at this moment I realize that this lady is calculating exactly what she just said... I am going over in my head how I can fix this, but really... is it necessary? If I explain to the lady that I had stepped on a zebra yesterday and accidentally said "stupid" will it even make sense? I mean.... stepping on a zebra doesn't even seem possible to a person who doesn't have children at home.... and then I will be saying "stupid" AGAIN out loud... and do I really need to explain all this over the condiment aisle in the grocery store? So I slink away and take the tiger and put it on my purse in the back of the cart and hope that the nice lady is finished shopping. 

Fast forward to later my cart is almost full and our friend "tupid" is barely hanging onto my purse... I add one more thing and he topples out onto the floor. OF COURSE a super sweet little old lady picks up her "tupid tiger" and hands it to her. I say "what do you say" and she says "Tank you tupid tigew"...

I'll let you guess my embarrassment

Long story short I HAD to address the word... obviously ignoring wasn't helping. 

FAIL ... again

tupid momma

We encourage our older kids to be careful what they say because our little ones are listening.  For some reason little ears ALWAYS hear and repeat the words we would like them not to. Often it happens like this-

Me- Oh wow! This house is a mess!  *looking around*  We better get this place cleaned up! Do you want to help momma clean up?

Kid5- Qween up!

Me- Let’s start with these dollies. These dollies are a mess. (Kid5 is eagerly helping pick up her mess and I am feeling like a great momma) Can you put your dollies back into their beds? Goodnight dollies, what fun we had with you today! What sweet little dollies you have Kid5.

Kid5- goodnight dowies. *gives them kisses*

Me- Good job Kid5! You ARE a big helper! Are you mommies little helper?

Kid5- I mommies hewlpew (helper)

Me-Lets get these animals picked up next, here’s a hippo, and can you put the hippo in his cage? Sweet little hippo! I bet he was a good boy today wasn’t he? I bet he helps his mommy too.

Kid5- Good boy hippo!

I talk and talk and talk, encouraging her to pick up, listen to mommy, what a sweet little thing. All of a sudden there is a turned upside down zebra laying on his freaking back all three thousand needle like legs straight up in the freaking air and my bare foot steps down on said zebra with no small amount of weight and I can’t hold back. It often goes like this-

Me- HOLY CRAP! WHAT THE FRICK AND FRACK WAS THAT? WERE YOU PLAYING WITH FREAKING NEEDLES? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? STUPID ZEBRA!

Kid5- TUPID ZEBWA!

One second..... wait..... one second, all the sweet goodnights, all the kind little words, all the mommies helper comments… and she picks up “TUPID ZEBWA?”

Awesome parenting moment for me.

FAIL

Moving Crew and one lucky momma

Kid2 is moving to HER OWN place in a few days and she is MORE than excited! We had our usual meet at her place, gather up all her belongings and shove them into our cars palooza the other night. It was a lot of shoving, stuffing, carrying and crossing our fingers that it would all fit. After we were all exhausted and packed up we had dinner together. While we were sitting at dinner I looked down at (mostly) all of my children and felt so lucky to have my kiddos in one place laughing and enjoying each other. They were passing napkins, wiping faces, sharing food and I felt whole. There is something so good about looking into the faces of your children and knowing they are happy and safe.

How did I get so lucky?

moo, hee-haw, oink lovin baby

I LOVE how kid5 classifies her animals... she utterly amazes me. She growls and chirps and barks and crawls all over the floor with her beloved animals. She puts them to sleep and wakes them up, she gives them water and food and hugs. What an amazing little human I have been given. 

*Lucky me*

blog? what?

Blogging? What’s that?

Blog

Noun

1 a. a Website containing the writer’s own experiences, observations, opinions, etc., and often having images and links to other websites.

Verb

To maintain or add new entries to a blog

I know! I know! Some people who are “dying” for me to blog shall remain nameless… (WM) To think that one person wants to read my thoughts!

Speaking of thoughts…. I have so many I feel like I couldn’t even begin to tell them all to you. So much has happened in this time that I haven’t been blogging. I’d love to catch you up but it’s too much. How about I give you a run down really quickly and then we’ll call us “all caught up”?

Kid1 turned TWENTY-ONE, but you already know that. He is about to be deployed… I can’t really wrap my mind around that.

Kid2 has turned NINETEEN, she lives in her own apartment, well she shares an apartment with a nightmare roommate and is getting her own place on the first so that’s coming up. She’s a big ol’ college girl and actually going to class! Shock- I know! She works a ton and is enjoying life.

Kid3 was NOT happy to be moving (we’ll get to that later) but has adjusted well to his new school, is about to get his license and is a whole SEVENTEEN years old! MY baby- seventeen….. it’s nuts!

Kid4 is as quirky and funny as ever. We’re still doing home school and loving it. She’s NINE!!!! This little darling momma’s baby is nine.

Kid5 is easily the most darling little thing that was ever born.  She’s hilarious and loving and keeps us all afloat!

We moved to Arkansas, crazy I know. Its absolutely beautiful and I feel lucky every single day to live in such beauty. I love it.

Bat Girl and I have struggled to live so far apart but we have a bond that can’t be broken so we’ll be okay. We don’t every day or anything like that ;)

Mr. B. is loving his new job and life is good.

All caught up? Lets call that good. 

a girl and her "boops"

Kid5 has gone through the most ridiculous phase of having to wear boots.  She sleeps in them, runs in them, wears them to school, wears them to the Dr., and wears ONLY them quite often. We have indulged her toddler fantasies because she’s too darn cute to say “no”. She has this idea that all weather is boot weather and everything matches boots. 

Apparently boots are the new black 

Happy Birthday and beer....

The other day I was in the store behind someone who was buying beer and the cashier asked for ID. The lady buying beer said "surely you are kidding me?" In her defense, she was DEFINITELY old enough. She was irritated about getting her ID out and she kept saying "I have children who can buy alcohol- OF COURSE I am old enough..." So, I checked out, left the store, loaded the groceries into my car and as I was backing out it hit me... SO DO I!

My son can buy alcohol... which Im sure I don't have to tell you is a terrifying feeling to a parent. Kid1 has never been a kid who got into major trouble, he didn't drink in high school so it's never been a huge concern of mine UNTIL NOW... All I could picture in my head was him standing in line at the store with a grocery cart full of beer and I felt sick about it! 

Every year I am sad at the kids growing so fast and I reminisce about their younger days when they were innocent and this year I am panicking about beer.... HOW ABSURD! It's a definite possibility that I have finally lost my mind. 

Happy Birthday Beer boy... I love you 

P.S. Your STILL NOT ALLOWED to drink beer! 

- your mom

**edit- I do apologize for the trashiness of this post... I felt really weird about even saying the word "beer"*

I love this...

Have you ever had a true north....? 

words, words the magical fruit, the more you eat the more ya...

words can rarely be expressed properly. One person says one thing and the other person hears something completely different. My ears rarely hear the right things, I am often mistaken, often confused and hurt by words. There are many things in this world that I simply don't understand... humans are most of those things. I just want to be happy, I want to enjoy life and know that the ones I love are happy to... but it's not my job to make sure they're happy... thats one of the most horrible things about growing up... you have to set strong boundaries where you have never set them before and it's painful on both sides. I mostly fail when it comes to communication, I assume... and we all know what that does. I don't want to put others out so I don't communicate properly... I over communicate which mostly makes people want to blow their heads off, or so it seems. I am silent when silence isn't necessary. My communication style is all messed up and jumbled in my head. Usually what my brain has told me to say is not what comes out of my mouth. What comes out of my mouth is pure emotion or pure fact. Neither one is an affective way to get across what I thought was my point but then what in reality is probably just an idea jumping around in my head... do I sound wishy washy? Don't worry, it's not you, it's me. Or at least I think it's me... ah heck talk to me, say anything... you'll feel super smart I promise! 

a rare love...

I heard a story once long ago that has stuck with me, changed me, put music in my heart and head. It was a story of pure love, the rare kind, the kind that comes to only a few people in this life. This love took place in a low unusual ground, the kind of place that people fall in love often. It was a romantic unlikely union and one that although powerful would not last long. The story was told to me by a tender hearted woman who confessed that it was the most commanding passion she had ever known. When I asked her why it didn't last she expressed to me as best as she could the depth of it all, and that it had been too much for her. She knew a love like this could never last, it was too perfect, beyond supreme, like a pure superb embrace that can only last a breath...

I think of this story often, when Im alone, when Im driving, before bed. What a feeling unmatched love can be. Her story remind me of a couple of sayings:

"There is love of course. And then there's life. it's enemy" -Jean Anouilh

"Tis better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all." -Alfred Lord Tennyson

The love still remains, it burns deep inside of her everyday she is routinely aware of the searing burn in her heart for her one true love, but she lives on. She moves forward. Step by step, day by day, she survives because she knows that what she had was real unmatched love never again to be had, but always to be cherished and locked deeply in her heart. 

Happy Birthday darling girl

OH' brother....

I LOVE brothers. Oh I love brothers! I adored my brother and I was so thrilled to be able to say I have "boys" and "brothers". There is nothing better than the camaraderie between brothers. Brothers are silly and gross, serious and sincere and the best friend anyone can hope for. Although my boys are biological, not all brothers are. There are a couple other boys in our lives who we consider to be part of our family too. These two are my strength so much of the time and I can't imagine a minute without them. 

My beauty. 

My heart.

My child.

My smile.

My warm.

My giggle.

My bright.

My wonder.

My busy.

My love.

summer, summer, summer time ...

Summer time... is a grand time for kids. We live in hot weather and "summer" starts early here for us. We get to clean up our bikes, grease up our skates, sweep off the swing set and pull out our flip flops. I don't enjoy summer like my kids do, but I LOVE watching them play in the hot Georgia sun.

I love to watch Kid4's hair trail behind her in the breeze while she rides her bike as fast as she can. She's free when she's riding her bike. She's free from the judgement, schoolwork, piers, she can be lost in thought and in her own head.

Watching Kid5 sift the sand through her little tiny fingers is pure joy. To see her little legs carry her through the yard from one thing to another is bliss! She will enjoy summer for the first time this year with no assistance. I can't wait to watch every minute!

Summertime is a time of freedom, a time for no worries and a time to play until the sun goes down.

Enjoy it friends :)

I like kids art and I cannot lie

I love my children's drawings, pictures, painting, weavings, handprints, folded paper, scribbles, handwriting.... I love it all. The boxes and boxes of art projects in my garage show it. I have lots of my children's art framed here and there in the house, but I want it ALL. I tried the ArtKive app on my phone and I didn't love it. It allows one piece of art per page and yes, I could make a collage myself and save it... but who has time for ALL that?

I decided to use my old reliable blurb.com and I could not be happier with the results. The book is perfect. I can't tell you how much paper I am able to rid of. I took pictures of all her Kindergarten through second grade art, many handwriting samples and a few pictures. Her book is 156 glorious pages! Some pages have nine pieces of art and some have only one. I highly suggest this method for archiving children's art work. She has looked through this book so many times since we recieved it and I know she will enjoy it even more as she grows! 

I am planning on doing a preschool art book, she has SO MUCH preschool art, a third through sixth grade art book, and who knows what else. I have been sorting boxes from the big kids too and want to make each of them a book of their art, their handwriting, little notes and funny things about them as well. I am pretty sure I haven't saved as much from them, but I bet I can fill up a book each. 

I can't wait for Kid5 to start drawing and writing! We'll be using blurb.com for years to come!

TRY IT. YOU'LL LOVE IT!

CATS.... all this time and all she has to talk about is cats....

Kid4 drew this in first grade :)

I read a children's book called "All Cats Have Aspergers Syndrome" and daily I am reminded of that with Kitty-Mae. Every single morning I am just positive that her thought process goes like this: I know she's in there. MEOW. I know if I meow just a few more times, she'll hear me. MEOW, MEOW, MEOW. I bet she didn't really hear me. MEEEOOOW. She probably isn't listening. MEOW. MEEOOW. MEEEEOOOW. MEOW. I bet she was distracted, let me try again. MEOW.

This happens until I let her in. This also often happens with Kid4, who also has Aspergers. Many days our conversations go like this:

Me- I am going to the store, you MAY not leave the house while Im gone, your brother is upstairs. Do you understand me?

Kid4- Yes.... (hesitates, and I wait knowing that she will ask something else...) but what if by BFF gets home?

Me- you MAY NOT go outside. period. NO. I'll be home soon.

Kid4- ok (in her best whiney voice)

****meanwhile as I walk into the store... RING RING****

Me- hello Kid4, how can I help you?

Kid4- MOOOOM, My BFF's home, can I go outside to play?

Me- are you serious?

Kid4- yes

Me- KID4, I said you were not going outside until I got home. Thats the end of it.

Kid4- Mom.....

Me- yes.....?

Kid4- but I'll be SO careful

Me- NO!

Kid4- her mom is home

Me- I am serious about this, I said no.

Kid4- even if Im really careful and don't ride my bike in the street?

Me- I am done with the conversation, we either hang up now and you stay in or you will spend the whole weekend inside! Do you understand me? Now you need to say goodbye and hang up the phone!

Kid4- goodbye

*****meanwhile at the store.....RING RING*****

Me- Hello.

Kid4- can she come in?

Me- HANG UP THE PHONE AND STEP AWAY FROM IT. I WILL BE HOME SOON.

Kid4- is that a no?

Me- HANG UP BEFORE I COME UNGLUED. IT's a NO!

Kid4- (a little scared) ok.

****click****

I then hurry through the rest of my visit ( I was gone less than 45 minutes) and get home and she runs past me saying "oh that wasn't so long..." and I mostly want to choke her because it would have been a lot quicker and a lot less irritating if she would have just let me shop and not called.

Heres where the Aspergers comes in, she really feels like if she says it differently, I will understand her. She honestly believes that the reason I have said no is because she said it wrong or I heard it wrong and my cat feels the same way!

I love the Aspergers in her for so many reasons, the persistent rephrasing of the same question is not one of them.

Happy Birthday to the one who turned my life rosy posy pink

Nineteen years ago I was laying in a hospital bed in writhing pain having natural child birth, and working so hard to see a healthy little tiny baby…. just baby. We didn't know if it was a boy or a girl and we didn't care, or so we thought.

I worked and worked…I cried and pushed and just when I had had enough, there she was, my daughter. We hadn't cared at all what sex the baby was until she was born. We both sobbed and couldn't believe our eyes, a little girl.

All of a sudden our world turned pink and flowery. All of a sudden I looked around and the world became a dangerous place. All of a sudden every stranger looked like a child molester to me and I couldn't keep her safe enough, close enough, protected enough from the world.

I've spent the better part of 19 years watching her grow, following her when she didn't know it, just so she would be safe. I have watched her from the window of my house, my car and every place in between. I have fallen to my knees praying for God to keep her safe and unharmed. I have paced my floors and my feet raw with worry about this little tiny girl, who incidentally still looks like a tiny girl to me, I don't care how old she looks to anyone else. I have made right choices and wrong choices, I have cursed and cried out for guidance because raising a daughter is hard work.

I have watched this little girl grow, tried to surround her with loving people who would show her a safer path and still the world feels scary to me for her. Every year she gets closer to understanding the heart strings between a mother and a daughter, but as she grows, every single day she loses a little bit of her childhood and gains a little more of her adulthood.

How will I show her that God has a plan for her? How will I give her the strength to look up and not down as she enters these hard years ahead?

All I can say Kid2 is "Be still and know", listen to your mother, she's smarter than you think and when it all comes right down to it, she has YOUR best interest at heart. After all she is the one who has fought tooth and nail for you your whole life.

Be still and know that I am God. Be still and know. Be still. Be.

Happy Birthday LITTLE girl. I love you so much more than I could ever express, more than you'll ever fathom and more than there are stars in the sky.

Slow down and breath. Slow down and Be.

-Your momma

Happy Birthday Keoni

I rushed to the hospital, I couldn't wait to see his little tiny face and squeeze his little hands. I was greeted by a little perfect boy with tall fluffy hair and I was in love. I hadn't felt this way since my mother had brought my baby sister home many years before, She had fluffy RED hair and this little beauty has dark black sticking up chick hair, I loved it. Words can hardly describe the feeling of babies and their little innocence, their perfectness, their beauty. He was certainly no exception.

A little later after all the pleasantries I stood in silence at the nursery window staring at him and wondering what he'd grow up to be. I wondered how tall he would be, how his voice would sound and more importantly, what he would call ME. I often wondered about the future, I often dreamed of what time held for people, for me, for little tiny flawless babies… I was young back then, I was a dreamer and in some ways I still am.

As the years crawled by he grew into a gorgeous little island boy, he loved the sun and sand, he loved everything that was outdoors: fishing, swimming, running in the sand. He was really beautiful in every way. He was a kind "well-loved local boy" who others were drawn to. He made you want to laugh and play and be free. He was silly and smart and amazing. When I think back to the day he was born I can remember the energy in his eyes, and as long as he lived, it never changed.

He was my nephew and I was his Auntie, he brought life to me, to my parents and his parents. He brought laughter to friends and strangers. He brought adventure to my children and to everyone he met. My nephew never met a stranger.

I miss him every day, I wonder what he would be like today, in his twenties, as a full grown boy? I wonder how tall he would have been, what would his voice sound like? He was taken from this earth on a hot summer day and I'll never forget the moment I learned he was gone.

Happy Birthday sweet island boy, Auntie loves you.

Roses are red,

Violets are blue.

Have a great February,

and I will too. 

draw something with Kid4

I LOVE playing Draw Something with Kid4. 

She is so creative and funny. 

The glue is from Lowe's- Ha Ha

The handcuffs crack me up!

And don't mind that she's painting with blood ;)

Happy Birthday A :)

Six hundred and twenty four days ago I was given a gift. This wasn't the ol' gift wrapped in a box, tied with a bow kind of gift, it was more like gift wrapped in a person kind of a gift. My little baby (Kid5) was wrapped up all snug in her birth mommas belly for  a whole nine months while we waited eagerly. Day after day as she grew in my nieces belly I prayed for her. Day and after day as she grew I wondered what her little kicks felt like to her momma. Day after day, hour after hour, minute after minute I could just feel her in my arms. I wanted this little princess more than I have ever wanted anything in my life. I couldn't wait to meet her.

Eighty nine weeks and one day ago after lots of pain and tears, after pushing and working so hard the nurse handed me this little beautiful gift. I held her perfect little body and watched her momma rest. I watched her momma feel relieved that the labor was over and I saw the most amazing thing in her eyes. I saw perfect contentment for her little girl. I had worried about how she would feel, I had prayed for the Lord to give her peace with her decision. Her eyes told me that she was at peace, her beautiful blue-green eyes told me that she knew her baby would be safe in my arms.

She and I spent the next few days together loving on our little baby girl and I wouldn't trade those days alone with her momma for anything in the world. She watched us bond and I watched her grow into mother. My niece will always be my Kid5's momma, she will always have been the only one who felt her kick and grow inside of her. She will also be the one special girl who gave ME a life to raise and adore. I will never be able to thank her enough for making ME a momma AGAIN!

I love you A.D.B.

Happy Birthday beautiful girl!

Love,
your baby momma ;)

better than a hallelujah

I read** the book "The Shack" and without going into detail because I just don't have the words to explain the book, I will tell you that it really spoke to me. After the book I heard Amy Grants song "Better than a hallelujah". I have heard this song before and I really love it, but this time it spoke to me differently.

Before I go any further here I want to put a disclaimer on the word "drunkard" I think many words are viewed as offensive when actually they aren't. This word means habitually drunk, an alcoholic. It's a fact with no emotion tied to it at all. It's a word, thats all. 

Have you ever heard a "drunkards cry"? A drunkards cry is honestly the most sincere cry I have ever heard. I've always known it was honest, I have always known it was sincere but I couldn't explain to you why.

I have known several habitually drunk people, but I have only heard a sincere drunkards cry from three.  The first time I heard the cry out for Gods help I was completely taken back, I was speechless and I wanted to take it all from them. I was helpless and they were hopeless. In her song she mentions "the honest cries of breaking hearts are better than a hallelujah" and I think thats such an amazing thought. Often we are wrapped up in obeying rules, following God or commands or people. We get awards, we get a pat on the back for following simple rules or playing a good game… but what about the cries from a drunkard? What about the honestly hopeless man who cries out because it's all he has left? Those are the cries that grab me and twist at my heart. The woman who throws herself down crying out for God to help her, the man who is grasping at all he has left those are the beautiful sounds if you listen to them. Those cries are the cries that are coming from the depths of a mans' soul.

Listen for a drunkards cry, a grieving mothers sob, a terrified soldiers moan, listen for  honest grief and reach out. Remember that the cry of a weak man really IS better than a hallelujah sometimes.

** I actually listened to the book and did not read it.

Hot cats, a rap

sung to the tune of "I like big butts"

I hate hot cats and I cannot lie

you other owners can't deny

when a cat walks in with a itty bitty grin

and that BIG MEOW in your face

I get STUNNED

….

my homegirls tried to warn me

but those whiskers you got made me so torn-ey

….

I like em' mute

I like em' cute

so DON'T turn around

DON'T stick it out

Even mommas want to shout

I hate HOT CATS!

Hot cats, the saga continues :(

Trying to ignore a cat it heat is like trying to ignore being beat with a stick. I can't tell you the number of times I have practically screamed from the MEOWING! My good friend Cara asked me why on earth wasn't she spayed and heres the thing… I can't be 100% sure what I thought about cats in heat because Im pretty sure I never thought about it besides Bat Girl saying "if you don't get the cat fixed soon she is going to YOWL a horrendous YOWL".  But in searching my brain I think it went a little like this

cat in heat
women in menopause-
cat grouchy
women grouchy
cat restless
women restless
cat is hot
women has HOT flashes
avoid crabby women
avoid crabby cat

DONE

I WAS WRONG.

(she'll be FIXED the second she can go, trust me)

potty mouth

One of my favorite memories of Kid4 takes place several years ago in McKinney Texas. My mom and I went downtown and visited a nice restaurant called Poppy's Garden cafe' for lunch. Kid4 had to potty so I took her to the bathroom. The restaurant is in an old house, its beautiful. It's wasn't particularly busy and there was a lady or two in the restroom. I situated Kid4 in the stall and waited while another lady washed her hands. All of a sudden Kid4 started shouting things like "POOP! POTTY! GAS! BOTTOM! POOP, POOP, POOP!" I was literally speechless, I am positive that the color drained from my face and that my mouth was hanging open. I was really trying to hold it together and was wishing with all of my might that I would have just stayed in the stall with her so that I could be hiding. I said "HONEY, what are YOU doing"? She very nicely and calmly said "Mom, I am saying the words that you said are ONLY words I can use in the bathroom". One lady snickered, another quickly excused herself and I just honestly wasn't sure what to say. She had a point, and I really had no ground to stand on. I think I said something like "how about we change the rule to only saying them in OUR bathroom?" She felt like that was a perfectly great addendum. I was wishing I had thought of that much sooner.

Now I look back and laugh, thank goodness. She still feels completely alone in the bathroom, like ALL bathrooms are sound proof. poor kid, she'll have some hard lessons when she starts dating ;)

mi familia

Dallas World Aquarium 

1/2013

I love my little family. I love my big family too. One of my favorite things has always been to load up all my kids in the car and GO. I would have such a peaceful feeling looking in the rear view mirror and knowing that all my kid-lings were right where they belong, WITH MOMMA.

Now days we travel with much less. We pack up two little girls, their little dollies, fancy shoes, hair bows and lovies and were off. I looked back several time on this trip and missed the faces of my big babies, the ones that travelled thousands upon thousands of miles behind me. My big babies were not as spoiled as my little baby girls are. They expected goober grape sandwiches and home made cookies and my little princesses expect a restaurant and a token for the road. Ahhh… the joys of getting older!

Mr. B. mentioned several times how different it is to travel now than it was back then. Im happy that they are adjusting into being grown, but I miss them. I think one day I'll rent an RV, pack them ALL up and go on a grand vacation. We'll laugh, talk about the old days, eat goober grape and homemade cookies!

Until then, I'll enjoy every single second with my little beauties and be thankful for the extra space in the car for their dollies :)

hot cats and teens, the saga

So my cat is in heat and I would like to say that I have never witnessed such horror. I have never seen a cat in heat but I HAVE had teenagers and I hate to admit that it is very similar! Keep an open mind here and trust that this post will NOT get gross, unless your grossed by teens or cats and in that case you better stop reading.

Recently two of my big kids, Kid1 and Kid2 have moved out and are starting their own lives, easy peasy…? Not so much! I thought I would have a little break from whining and moaning until I came home to the horror that is a cat in heat :(

My cat was meowing and howling and begging to GO OUT. Kid4 said that she thinks that she is "acting inappropriately" and I would have to agree. I have felt the EXACT same way about my teens. Kitty moans and whines and scratches at the door. My teens have whined and begged and stood at the door wanting to go out while I said "NO".

Our conversations have often gone like this:
TEEN-hey mom, can I go to the all night after prom party?
ME- well heck yeah, I wouldn't want you to miss THAT!
TEEN- Awesome mom, thanks so much.
ME- Hey (insert teen name here), it's no problem. Im just going to need the address of the party
TEEN- I don't know it
ME- hmmmmmm….. I bet whoever is having the party knows the address, so why dont you wait till you get there and then ask them
TEEN- oh, ok, yeah… I'll do that. What if I can't get it?
ME- Then you can't go.
TEEN- I'll figure it out.

meanwhile back at home after prom…. I get a text with the address…..

TEEN- the address is (socially hosted party, anywhere USA)
ME- Cool, thanks, I'll see you in an hour
TEEN- WHAT? WAIT! I thought you said I could stay?
ME- well honey, I did, but I am going to have to make sure your safe
TEEN- MOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!
Me- either I check on you and you stay or I come and get you
TEEN- fine mom.
ME- great, see you in an hour :)

An hour later I pull up to the party.

TEEN- hey mom
ME- Hi honey, having fun? I hope there is no drinking going on… darn, I only wore my pajama pants, but id really like to meet the parents…. hmmmm…. I doubt they will mind what Im wearing… don't you think?
*mortified* TEEN- MOM! NOOOO….. it's ok, I met them and they are really nice.
ME- Awwww… heck, okay, well I'll see you in an hour, I'll wear jeans and go in then.
*confused* TEEN- WHAaaaa….? Wait…. mom….. Im FINE… (insert all the insisting, the excuses, the "I don't drinks" and "why can't you trusts mes" here)
ME- well honey, if you want to stay, I am TOTALLY great with that, but I will want to see you once an hour every hour. I think it's very generous that Im willing to drive here and check on you, so you can stay.
TEEN- never mind, I'll go with you, thats ridiculous, I don't want you here every hour
ME- are you sure, I really don't mind. I like having the quiet time in the car alone
TEEN- MOM LETS GO, JUST DRIVE
ME- awww heck, thanks! This will insure that I will get a good nights sleep tonight. (insert mom evil laugh here)

*crickets* really nothing left to say at this point and there are lovely oldies on the radio… such a nice quiet drive home.

How does this have anything to do with the cat?!

Cat- MEOW MEOW MEOW, MOAN, GROAN, I want to go out!
Me- sure, Id love to take you out ON. A. LEASH.
Cat- SCREAM, WHINE, RUB ON THE DOOR while refusing a leash
Me- if you don't want a leash, I bet we can compromise… this is no problem. I have this great kennel and I am more than happy to put IT outside and YOU in it.
Cat- MEOW MEOW MEOW….. no thanks to the kennel.
Me- how about the laundry room?
CAT- MEOW SCREAM, MOAN, COMPLAIN
Me- how about the garage?
CAT- SCRATCH, MEOW, SCREAM, RUB….

Are you still asking what cats in heat and teens have in common? Whine, BEG, whine, whine, whine.

I WIN.

Moral of the story? Get Cats! I put her in the garage and if Im far enough in the house I can't hear a thing! She has no phone, no computer and no thumbs and can't open the door! Its great.

Sisters

Is solace anywhere more comforting than in the arms of a sister.  ~Alice Walker

Thankful- BatGirl

                                                    Remember Bat Girl doesn't allow pics…

You know when someone gives you just that great gift that you have no idea how to thank them for? You know how you have the most amazing time with someone and you can't even begin to put into words how much fun you had? Thats how I feel about Bat Girl. She's like the best gift, the best date, the best laugh you've ever had all rolled up into one and I love her.

Bat Girl has been my sidekick, my partner in crime, my nurse and my pastor all rolled up in one beautiful person and I know that Im the luckiest girl in the world to have her.

Bat Girl and I can sit in silence for hours and it never feels awkward, we can talk nonstop and never stop laughing, we can know exactly what the other one meant because I swear sometimes we speak our own language. We are often partners in parenting our many large and small children. I could not have parented my children without such a best friends as Bat Girl. She is an ear to them, a soft place to land and a harsh momma when needed.

I think if Bat Girl and I ever wrote a book about our adventures we would read it ourselves over and over because above all, we love being best friends, comrades and kindred spirits!

Be still and be thankful for your friends, I love you Bat Girl!

Thankful -"Aunt LEEEEEEnda"

My Kid4 and Lindas Kid2 and 3. Friends for life :)

I love me some Leeeeeenda! Let me tell you about my friend Linda, she absolutely was going to be my friend whether I wanted it or not. I love that about her now but back then, I wasn't so sure. She invited me to every play date, every girls shopping trip to Dallas and every MOPS meeting. I declined probably 95% of the invites.

I got brave once, bundled my little Kid4 up and went to a play date that no one else showed up to. I was totally freaked out, I am not social and had no idea what we were going to talk about. We spent the day talking and laughing and although skeptical I really enjoyed her company.

Our little babies are only 4 days apart and we spent many days letting them crawl around and enjoy being babies together. Over the years I completely fell in love with my Linda and can't imagine my life without her. Shes spent hours praying for me, my husband and children. She knows all my sins and bad behavior and she has always loved me anyway.

When I head back to East Texas, she is always my first stop. I can't imagine life without her, I deeply treasure her friendship and respect the person that she is to me and so many others.

AYE LEEEENDA…. I love you!

THANKFUL- Kid5

To say I am thankful for Kid5 is a gross underestimate.

Thankful (adjective)- pleased, relieved, expressing gratitude

Im not sure there is a word strong enough to describe my feelings for Kid5. From the minute that Kid5 was brought to my attention I deeply loved her. I spent nights worrying about her and days daydreaming about her. I knew she was meant to be "Kid5" from the moment I saw her on that ultrasound. We all packed in the room and the nurse announced that she was a girl, I practically did cartwheels of joy. I think I smiled for a week straight.

Kid5 is adopted, she is a gift from her birth mother to our family and we cherish her every little breath and movement. I loved her birth mother too. Her birth mother was a little tiny beautiful blonde who was full of life from the moment she was born.

She gave me the gift of seeing my baby be born, being the first to hold her, the first to kiss her. There are no words to express my gratitude for her. I love her birth mom deeply, I hope she knows that I do.

My beautiful, full of life, curious, amazing Kid5 is a miracle to us. She makes every teenager smile even on a bad day. She brings a snicker to the elderly and hysterical laughter from the little ones. She brings pure happiness, true joy and utter excitement to our lives. We are much older now, we are able to enjoy every mess, every spill, and every diaper. We have loved the car seats, the highchairs, the bottles, the tiny clothes, we love it all. In fact, we definitely indulge her every whim and are totally okay with it. She drags us around from room to room, toy to toy and we are delighted to hear every noise she utters.

Kid5 lights up our lives and anyone she smiles at. She loves everyone she meets and makes any stranger feel at home. She is the friendliest, funniest little perfect girl. This little brilliant beauty completed our family and I can't imagine our life without her.

I love you little busy bee :)

Be still and be thankful for every gift in life.

Thankful- Kid4

I have taken a big break in blogging lately but I am always writing in my head. I can think of a million things to say about my beautiful Kid4 yet, I can't seem to get it down on my blog. She leaves me speechless, unsure that she's really a child, she has the wisdom of a wise old Grandma and the advice of a well educated Psychologist.

Kid4 came into the world screaming her little face off and spent many years tortured by the world around her, she has Aspergers. Her ears were infected for years and they hurt. She was for all intents and purposes deaf for a year. I swear to you that if it weren't for the 6 other little hands helping me I might have become a zombie from sleep depravation. Kid4 was our family baby, we all pitched it, we all changed diapers, we all sat up nights with her, we all utterly adored her.

I don't know how she does it, but she has an ability to deeply understand others. She has profound advice and suggestions. She once told an alcoholic very softly that it was time he quit drinking and that he needed help, that same alcoholic is sober today, almost 3 years later. He heard HER.

She is beautiful in a thousand different ways and only silly to those who know her well. She deeply loves who she loves and truly doesn't understand violence or hate. She is often our anchor and our soft place.

The world baffles her, but if you listen to her, if you really stop and listen she deeply understands the important things in life, in people and in her surroundings. I am thankful for her as a person, for her as my daughter, for her as a sister and for her as an aspie girl. I would NOT change one thing about her because her quirks, her funny little things, her aspergers make her the most perfect little girl in my eyes.

Be sill and listen, a little child just might surprise you.