sick baby

Kid4 has not been feeling well lately. I thought it might be allergies but finally I gave in and took her to the Dr. Poor kid, she has a virus.

The Dr. wanted to test her for Mono so they needed a blood sample (NO MONO- don't worry Steph). As they were taking blood from her arm I was telling the nurse how her older brother passes clean out (remember THIS story?) and just then the nurse layed her back and said "uh-oh, it looks like it runs in the family".

Poor Kid4 lost all her color and started to fall asleep...

She quickly felt better with stickers and some suckers...

me at 3 am "connecting"

How do you connect with your kids? Do you meet them half way? Do you wait till they come to you? Do you push them into connecting?

I don’t know the best way to connect with my kids, in fact *gasp* I’m really unsure of this whole parenting teens thing but I know I want to connect with them. I want to connect with them on an emotional level, laughing and enjoying them. I also want to connect with them on a parental level, giving them good solid advice and guiding them through rough teenage waters. I hope I am connecting with them, I hope they’ll look back and feel connected to me too.

I have been spending more time with my teens lately and much to my surprise I love it. I love watching them grow. I love hearing them laugh about ridiculous things. I like their inappropriate humor, and stupid jokes. I am in TOTAL LOVE with their friends and I think connecting on their level is important. Like they probably won't open up to you in front of the news... but they might open up over a middle of the night breakfast at waffle house.

I love how teenagers have a light in their eye, a spark in their heart. Teenagers have a zip in their step that adults lose. I try to keep up with my teens, loving them, talking to them, listening to them, trying to understand where they’re coming from.

Love your teens, enjoy them, seize the day, the moment- they’re only teens once (thank God)

Bat Girls on the run

if you see this guy at a gas station- RUN!

I have a special prayer request for you today. Bat Girl's mom has been having some health problems so Bat Girl has gone to San Antonio to be with her mom for a few days. Her family could certainly use any prayers.

Anyone who knows us well won't believe that I didn't go with her but we decided I had better stay home to hold down the fort and the preschool. I spent a little while with her last night as she was packing and getting ready and as we said goodbye I just knew I would miss her like crazy till she comes home again. I was right, I woke up today feeling very sad that she wasn't 3 houses away...

I miss you Bat Girl, hug your mom, don't hurry home (even though I want you too) and BE SAFE!!!

I love you,
Ashley





P.S. don't worry about a single thing.

high school memories

It was wonderful to see Stephanie's family. It had been 17 years since I had seen them. I couldn't believe it had been so long. I use to spend so much time with their family, they took me camping and to the beach so often. I loved Steph's family, especially her little brother Andy, who by the way grew WAY UP!

Dear Z family, it was so wonderful to see you again and see how you've grown and changed. You blessed my life all those years ago and I am so thankful that we can meet up again and enjoy catching up with each other. Thank you for a perfectly wonderful time!

Love you all,

Ashley

she's just a small town girl...

Stephanie and I were sitting working on our lap tops as our little precious girls were having a little slumber party in her daughter’s room. We we’re loving listening to them giggle and wondering if they would ever get tired. They talked and giggled and sang. We kept looking at each other laughing and saying “can you believe our daughters are playing together?” It was so fun.

We sat there listening to them typing away, reading blogs and editing photos and all of sudden Stephanie’s darling little girl started singing a bible song. She sang “Our God is so good, our God is so great……” it was the sweetest little voice I have ever heard. There we sat smiling from ear to ear enjoying London’s little song. When London was finished with her song, she said “It’s your turn” to my kid4. Here is what my kid belted out-

“She’s just a small town girl, living in a lonely world

She took the midnight train going anywhere

He's just a city boy, born and raised in south Detroit

He took the midnight train going anywhere…”

Steph looked over at me laughing and I said “YES, journey”.

We both just laughed and loved the moment.

I guess that’s what happens when you have teenagers and 5 year olds together.

girls, girls, girls

My girls and I enjoyed Stephanie and her family so much. The first day we got all ready and Steph made us the greatest breakfast casserole. We ate and then headed out to have a girls day.

We headed straight for the mall to play at the little play place for a little while and ride the carousel. We had a great lunch; the girls chose McDonalds- are you surprised? I think if left up to 5 year olds they always chose McDonalds. We then went to a girls movie and out to a fantastic dinner!

Steph, thanks for the loveliest time, thanks for staying up late and thanks for being you!

our daily driving pictures

The girls and I had such a lovely time in Kentucky. First of all it was a beautiful and a super easy drive. Second of all it’s quite a wonderful feeling to be all shut up in the car with your own kids. We laughed and told stories, kid2 took pictures of us and we sent them home to our boys so they could see how much fun we were having. When we left we agreed to send them one picture a day of us and we shortly realized that we couldn’t get all 3 of us in the picture so Kid2 and I settled on just us- we had so much fun!

Here are our daily pictures of us on our road trip.

YES... I'm driving.

John Tesh would not agree

While we visited my best friend from high school in Kentucky we had many fun adventures.

This is just one of the funny things that happened while on our girls trip.

The first morning I woke up and stretched and got up and stumbled into the bathroom to get ready to spend a wonderful first day with Steph and her family. I stood at the sink and realized that my toothbrush was in the truck.

Can I just tell you that it was FAH-REEZING. The thought of walking out to the truck was just not an option for me.

I stood there looking at only Kid4's toothbrush and the temptation set in. I was trying to reason with myself... how many germs could one 5 year have in her mouth? (dont tell me if you know) How bad can it be to use her toothbrush, she's got my DNA.... I mean we share germs anyway.... RIGHT?

I stood there contemplating, wondering if I should just suck it up and go outside, wondering if I would get cooties if I used it and wondering if it was worth it. Her tooth brush stared up at me so innocently... finally I was convinced it wouldn't kill me. I mean she's FIVE... it's not like Im brushing with a teenagers nasty toothbrush.... right?

I picked it up, put toothpaste on it and decided to go for it! I was living dangerously and staying warm... As I put it in my mouth, I realized that it was already wet. I told myself it probably hadn't dried from thenight before because it was so cold.

I brushed, my breath was acceptable to breathe on friends. It was done.

I went upstairs to join Stephs family and realized that both my girls were already up and visiting with my lovely friends. When Steph stepped into the kitchen for a minute Kid2 leaned over to me and whispered "I left my tooth brush in the truck and it's so cold that I just used Bella's, is that TOO gross?"

I almost died!

The girls and I are having a lovely time in Kentucky with my friend Steph and her family!

We spent an entire girls day together yesterday at the mall playing, watching the princess and the frog, and having a delightful dinner where the girls got to make their own pizza's AND put them in the oven!

Today we are looking forward to going to a birthday party and I'm so excited to see Steph's parents and siblings today!

What a GREAT trip!

(i tried to post a couple pics and failed- pics later)

my kids

I love...

how creative you are, how you make every single little thing fun.

how hard you work and how excited you are to get your paycheck.

how you drive (even though I don't act like it.)

how you are so excited to surprise us.

how you all love to be together.

how you all love each other.

how you get frustrated with each other but know its worth working out.

how you value your friendships enough to work at them.

how pure and sweet your hearts are.

how you smile and your laugh is infectious.

Dear Kid1, Kid2 and Baby T,

I could sit near you all while you laugh and play forever. Last night I sat there and watched while you laughed and made funny pictures and I can't even believe that one day my house will be quiet without you. I sit and wonder sometimes how I will make it through my days when you guys aren't here anymore. I wonder if we'll still all get together and stop our lives for just a few moments to laugh again and to be together and remember when you were young.

I promise you that when you do grow old and leave home that I will call you and we'll laugh, that when your tired from a long day that I will remind you of all the fun things we did together when you were young. I promise you that there will never be a time when my door is closed to you. I promise you that I'll be waiting here for you when you crave a good laugh, need a hug or just want to talk. I love you kids and I'm so honored to watch you grow and change.

on the road again....

I'm off to visit my best friend from high school Stephanie and her family! The girls and I are all packed and we're heading out at noon for Kentucky to enjoy friends all weekend. I love a weekend planned with just my girls. We'll be all locked up for hours and hours only talking about girly things... errrr..... let's be honest Kid4 will probably talk the entire drive... BUT Kid2 and I will try to tune her out and catch up on life.

Im out....

see ya Tuesday

things about Thing 1 and Thing 2

Do you ever feel like you have lost touch with your kids? I think it's so much easier to keep in contact with what your small kids are doing and we become lazy when it comes to our teens. I think that somewhere along the way we look at them and while they are pushing for freedom we are secretly happy to have a break from entertaining and keeping kids busy. We welcome a sleep over, an afternoon with friends. We start to allow them to break away from us a little bit at a time.

But where do we stop? How do you let them go but still keep them close? How do you promote independence and also watch them with a close eye?

I entered my kid’s teenage years with gritted teeth. Not only did I not want them to leave the little kid phase, let’s face it, junior high kids are barely recognizable as humans. I was so sick of the junior high phase I just knew I should be dreading high school. While they whined and complained their way through junior high and I tried not to ring their necks as they grew something happened. One day all of a sudden I realized that these kids, these struggling awkward junior high kids were human again. They talked normal, without a boss or a whine, they seemed fairly reasonable with their requests, human. Weird. Time for a readjustment on my part.

While I readjusted and got to know them again I was amazed at what I saw. I saw practically grownups dealing with issues, solving problems, making friends and maneuvering the ropes of life with quite a bit of grace. I stood back in awe of the friends they were choosing for themselves, and falling in love with their friends too. When did it happen? When did my babies grow up to be reasonable people?
Teenagers get a bad reputation. I'm not saying they are perfect- they are NOT, but they do deserve a chance. My neighbors cringe at my boys when they mess around outside, they literally run and get inside. I think they are afraid to talk to my teenagers or their friends and they are missing out. The things I've learned from my teens, the friends that I have had the opportunity to know through them are priceless.

Looking back I wouldn't change a thing, not the screaming babies, not the I wrote on my wall again, not the I will probably never remember my homework so why ask, not the awkwardness of junior highers. Do you want to know why? (I know you can barely wait) Because if I changed one moment, one single thing, my teenagers wouldn't be who they are scars and all.

I love them, I love spending time with them and I cherish every last moment that we have because you just never know when the last time will be.

Thank you Kid1 and Kid2 for being lovely, confident and for not being afraid to be individuals. Thank you for being you. You're both amazing and I am looking forward to many many more years of time spent laughing, talking and connecting. I love you more than I can say.

Mom

the learning permit of life

This morning, my husband told Kid2 that experiencing life is like having a drivers permit. Just because you’re driving through your neighbor’s yard doesn’t mean you have to continue. STOP, reassess the situation and start over. Just because you’re speeding along doesn’t mean you can’t slow down.

One drink doesn’t make you an alcoholic. It’s what you do with it after that one drink, its stopping, deciding not to take another, making better choices. Better choices are what count.

As we raise teens in this confusing world I find myself saying to them and their friends often these things: If you’re doing something that you’re not sure you can live with STOP. Take a moment and reassess the situation. I always ask them to ask themselves if they can live with the decisions they’re making. What are the effects of their choices going to be? Lots of kids take one drink and feel like total failures, lots of kids smoke one joint and feel like losers, lots of kids go “too far” with the opposite sex and feel easy and cheap. Your mistakes don’t define you. I try to drill into my kids heads that making a mistake is just simply that, it’s a mistake; it’s not the rest of your life. I try to remind them not to let the choices define them and to adjust the choices that they make so they can live them.

Teenagers automatically get permits to life and as we ride along in the passenger seat nervously guiding them I think it’s important for us as parents to remind ourselves that we too made mistakes but for most of us those mistakes didn’t define who we ended up being and how we have lived our lives. Guide them along, encourage them to make good choices, reassure them when they make mistakes, and love them while you’re doing it. It will all pay off when they’re grown (I hope).

Sound easy? I wish it was!

get out and please don't leave me!

Are your kids dating yet? What’s the thing with dating? What can I do to help my kids make good choices? Why am I so excited to see the excitement in her eyes when she’s headed out the door and then a nervous wreck once the door closes?

Let me back up and give you a little history about our kids and dating. Kid1 “dated” a girl a year ago; she was quite a high maintenance character to say the least. Neither one of them could drive so they were double dating with us; I never saw so many movies in my life! She was very shy and super bossy; we didn’t like her, but tolerated her. Although he was sad when he ended things with her (religious differences and more) we we’re relieved.

Kid1 has “dated” a few girls here and there, mostly as friends, you know Waffle House and a movie type of a thing. I’m totally cool with Kid1 dating and he is old enough and he’s a boy. WHY ARE WE OKAY WITH BOYS DATING and girls we are more uptight about. It’s ridiculous!

Okay, so Kid2 has had a couple of “boyfriends” in the past, you know the type that hold your hand at school and the ones where your family has to have an obligatory dinner with a strange family to support your daughters dating decisions?

Kids 1 and 2 have quite a strange and close relationship. Their relationship is a whole different post. My Kid1 has several girls he thinks are cute, but he has newly fallen in love with his car and the relationship between a boy and his car is like no other. Kid2 is a different story. She is a very faithful friend to girls and boys alike. She has a very close friend who I know, no matter what she says about it, she would love to date. He is a darling boy whom we loved immediately. We would love for her to “date” him. They go to dinner, spend hours talking, laugh and have a blast together- but they are not “dating” (that’s what they say anyway) for blogging sake, we will call him Baby T.

Want to know the problem with it all? I’m not sure I ever want them to date. By them I mean my kids… want to know another problem? I’m also afraid they won’t date… what if they don’t date and never move out? (but what if they DO move out- oh dear!)

Baby T is Kid1’s best friend. I thought that this would a be perfect arrangement. He could take Kid2 out on a date and then when he drops her off he can hang out with Kid1… Kid1 does not see it this way. Apparently dating each others friends is not quite as easy as I thought.

Why is this so confusing? Why does dating have to be such a pain in the neck? I’m considering buying a house boat and moving far far away from everyone… no more dating, no more drama… but….. What if they don’t date and never move out?

little beauty

We had a lovely time while my parents were here. We spent time playing games, eating yummy food, celebrating the Holiday and sight seeing.

One of my Mom’s favorite places is Macon, Georgia. When she comes to visit we do something special in Macon and enjoy the sights and sounds of beautiful Macon. We like to make a stop by the visitor’s center and check out anything new and then head out to see what we can see. Tuesday we ate at a lovely restaurant called between the bread, we drove through Rose Hill cemetery, drove the streets of enchanting Macon and enjoyed being together near the Ocmulgee.

On our way to get coffee we ran across this darling little church, I’d like to say that I know the history of it, but I don’t. What I do know is that it is a beautiful little church and I’d like to take pictures of every inch of it.

Macon is certainly a place full of history and extreme beauty!

the older the deader...and a charm

A conversation about my oldness

Kid4- Momma can I have a charm from your bracelet?

Me- no honey, I don't want to take it off.

Kid4- but I want something to remember you by.

Me- Honey, Im NOT going anywhere.

Kid4- Mom! You are going to die in a few days and I HAVE to have something to remember you by. PLEASE mom, PLEASE!

Me- Honey, I am not going to die. Why do you say that?

Kid4- because you are SO OLD and old people die.

Me- honey I don't even have grey hair yet!

Kid4- MOM seriously, you're REALLY old.

Me- well if I die, you can have the whole bracelet.

Kid4-okay.

my amazing girl

Is amazing.
Is a go getter.
Is a strong girl.
Is going to grow up to be SOMEONE!
Is beautiful.
Is someone to look up to.

I love you darling girl, I love everything about you. You amaze me every single day. You have an old soul, a young heart and knowledge beyond your years. I love being amazed by you daily.

Keep being you, be true to yourself and I LOVE the pink hair!

Daddy's girl