hot cats and teens, the saga

So my cat is in heat and I would like to say that I have never witnessed such horror. I have never seen a cat in heat but I HAVE had teenagers and I hate to admit that it is very similar! Keep an open mind here and trust that this post will NOT get gross, unless your grossed by teens or cats and in that case you better stop reading.

Recently two of my big kids, Kid1 and Kid2 have moved out and are starting their own lives, easy peasy…? Not so much! I thought I would have a little break from whining and moaning until I came home to the horror that is a cat in heat :(

My cat was meowing and howling and begging to GO OUT. Kid4 said that she thinks that she is "acting inappropriately" and I would have to agree. I have felt the EXACT same way about my teens. Kitty moans and whines and scratches at the door. My teens have whined and begged and stood at the door wanting to go out while I said "NO".

Our conversations have often gone like this:
TEEN-hey mom, can I go to the all night after prom party?
ME- well heck yeah, I wouldn't want you to miss THAT!
TEEN- Awesome mom, thanks so much.
ME- Hey (insert teen name here), it's no problem. Im just going to need the address of the party
TEEN- I don't know it
ME- hmmmmmm….. I bet whoever is having the party knows the address, so why dont you wait till you get there and then ask them
TEEN- oh, ok, yeah… I'll do that. What if I can't get it?
ME- Then you can't go.
TEEN- I'll figure it out.

meanwhile back at home after prom…. I get a text with the address…..

TEEN- the address is (socially hosted party, anywhere USA)
ME- Cool, thanks, I'll see you in an hour
TEEN- WHAT? WAIT! I thought you said I could stay?
ME- well honey, I did, but I am going to have to make sure your safe
TEEN- MOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!
Me- either I check on you and you stay or I come and get you
TEEN- fine mom.
ME- great, see you in an hour :)

An hour later I pull up to the party.

TEEN- hey mom
ME- Hi honey, having fun? I hope there is no drinking going on… darn, I only wore my pajama pants, but id really like to meet the parents…. hmmmm…. I doubt they will mind what Im wearing… don't you think?
*mortified* TEEN- MOM! NOOOO….. it's ok, I met them and they are really nice.
ME- Awwww… heck, okay, well I'll see you in an hour, I'll wear jeans and go in then.
*confused* TEEN- WHAaaaa….? Wait…. mom….. Im FINE… (insert all the insisting, the excuses, the "I don't drinks" and "why can't you trusts mes" here)
ME- well honey, if you want to stay, I am TOTALLY great with that, but I will want to see you once an hour every hour. I think it's very generous that Im willing to drive here and check on you, so you can stay.
TEEN- never mind, I'll go with you, thats ridiculous, I don't want you here every hour
ME- are you sure, I really don't mind. I like having the quiet time in the car alone
TEEN- MOM LETS GO, JUST DRIVE
ME- awww heck, thanks! This will insure that I will get a good nights sleep tonight. (insert mom evil laugh here)

*crickets* really nothing left to say at this point and there are lovely oldies on the radio… such a nice quiet drive home.

How does this have anything to do with the cat?!

Cat- MEOW MEOW MEOW, MOAN, GROAN, I want to go out!
Me- sure, Id love to take you out ON. A. LEASH.
Cat- SCREAM, WHINE, RUB ON THE DOOR while refusing a leash
Me- if you don't want a leash, I bet we can compromise… this is no problem. I have this great kennel and I am more than happy to put IT outside and YOU in it.
Cat- MEOW MEOW MEOW….. no thanks to the kennel.
Me- how about the laundry room?
CAT- MEOW SCREAM, MOAN, COMPLAIN
Me- how about the garage?
CAT- SCRATCH, MEOW, SCREAM, RUB….

Are you still asking what cats in heat and teens have in common? Whine, BEG, whine, whine, whine.

I WIN.

Moral of the story? Get Cats! I put her in the garage and if Im far enough in the house I can't hear a thing! She has no phone, no computer and no thumbs and can't open the door! Its great.

Sisters

Is solace anywhere more comforting than in the arms of a sister.  ~Alice Walker

Thankful- BatGirl

                                                    Remember Bat Girl doesn't allow pics…

You know when someone gives you just that great gift that you have no idea how to thank them for? You know how you have the most amazing time with someone and you can't even begin to put into words how much fun you had? Thats how I feel about Bat Girl. She's like the best gift, the best date, the best laugh you've ever had all rolled up into one and I love her.

Bat Girl has been my sidekick, my partner in crime, my nurse and my pastor all rolled up in one beautiful person and I know that Im the luckiest girl in the world to have her.

Bat Girl and I can sit in silence for hours and it never feels awkward, we can talk nonstop and never stop laughing, we can know exactly what the other one meant because I swear sometimes we speak our own language. We are often partners in parenting our many large and small children. I could not have parented my children without such a best friends as Bat Girl. She is an ear to them, a soft place to land and a harsh momma when needed.

I think if Bat Girl and I ever wrote a book about our adventures we would read it ourselves over and over because above all, we love being best friends, comrades and kindred spirits!

Be still and be thankful for your friends, I love you Bat Girl!

Thankful -"Aunt LEEEEEEnda"

My Kid4 and Lindas Kid2 and 3. Friends for life :)

I love me some Leeeeeenda! Let me tell you about my friend Linda, she absolutely was going to be my friend whether I wanted it or not. I love that about her now but back then, I wasn't so sure. She invited me to every play date, every girls shopping trip to Dallas and every MOPS meeting. I declined probably 95% of the invites.

I got brave once, bundled my little Kid4 up and went to a play date that no one else showed up to. I was totally freaked out, I am not social and had no idea what we were going to talk about. We spent the day talking and laughing and although skeptical I really enjoyed her company.

Our little babies are only 4 days apart and we spent many days letting them crawl around and enjoy being babies together. Over the years I completely fell in love with my Linda and can't imagine my life without her. Shes spent hours praying for me, my husband and children. She knows all my sins and bad behavior and she has always loved me anyway.

When I head back to East Texas, she is always my first stop. I can't imagine life without her, I deeply treasure her friendship and respect the person that she is to me and so many others.

AYE LEEEENDA…. I love you!

THANKFUL- Kid5

To say I am thankful for Kid5 is a gross underestimate.

Thankful (adjective)- pleased, relieved, expressing gratitude

Im not sure there is a word strong enough to describe my feelings for Kid5. From the minute that Kid5 was brought to my attention I deeply loved her. I spent nights worrying about her and days daydreaming about her. I knew she was meant to be "Kid5" from the moment I saw her on that ultrasound. We all packed in the room and the nurse announced that she was a girl, I practically did cartwheels of joy. I think I smiled for a week straight.

Kid5 is adopted, she is a gift from her birth mother to our family and we cherish her every little breath and movement. I loved her birth mother too. Her birth mother was a little tiny beautiful blonde who was full of life from the moment she was born.

She gave me the gift of seeing my baby be born, being the first to hold her, the first to kiss her. There are no words to express my gratitude for her. I love her birth mom deeply, I hope she knows that I do.

My beautiful, full of life, curious, amazing Kid5 is a miracle to us. She makes every teenager smile even on a bad day. She brings a snicker to the elderly and hysterical laughter from the little ones. She brings pure happiness, true joy and utter excitement to our lives. We are much older now, we are able to enjoy every mess, every spill, and every diaper. We have loved the car seats, the highchairs, the bottles, the tiny clothes, we love it all. In fact, we definitely indulge her every whim and are totally okay with it. She drags us around from room to room, toy to toy and we are delighted to hear every noise she utters.

Kid5 lights up our lives and anyone she smiles at. She loves everyone she meets and makes any stranger feel at home. She is the friendliest, funniest little perfect girl. This little brilliant beauty completed our family and I can't imagine our life without her.

I love you little busy bee :)

Be still and be thankful for every gift in life.

Thankful- Kid4

I have taken a big break in blogging lately but I am always writing in my head. I can think of a million things to say about my beautiful Kid4 yet, I can't seem to get it down on my blog. She leaves me speechless, unsure that she's really a child, she has the wisdom of a wise old Grandma and the advice of a well educated Psychologist.

Kid4 came into the world screaming her little face off and spent many years tortured by the world around her, she has Aspergers. Her ears were infected for years and they hurt. She was for all intents and purposes deaf for a year. I swear to you that if it weren't for the 6 other little hands helping me I might have become a zombie from sleep depravation. Kid4 was our family baby, we all pitched it, we all changed diapers, we all sat up nights with her, we all utterly adored her.

I don't know how she does it, but she has an ability to deeply understand others. She has profound advice and suggestions. She once told an alcoholic very softly that it was time he quit drinking and that he needed help, that same alcoholic is sober today, almost 3 years later. He heard HER.

She is beautiful in a thousand different ways and only silly to those who know her well. She deeply loves who she loves and truly doesn't understand violence or hate. She is often our anchor and our soft place.

The world baffles her, but if you listen to her, if you really stop and listen she deeply understands the important things in life, in people and in her surroundings. I am thankful for her as a person, for her as my daughter, for her as a sister and for her as an aspie girl. I would NOT change one thing about her because her quirks, her funny little things, her aspergers make her the most perfect little girl in my eyes.

Be sill and listen, a little child just might surprise you.

Thankful (kid3)

I doubt that I can fully express my adoration for my third baby, my second son. When I was pregnant I didn't care if he was a boy or a girl, I was just excited to cuddle a little tiny baby again. He was born a big ol' healthy boy! He was absolutely perfect. By the time he came along, I had already experienced birth, boys and girls, I felt at peace with the fact that babies are absolutely not born skin colored. I didn't have the same concerns. My Kid3 was an easy baby, a breeze of a toddler and for the most part an easy teen. Sometimes lately when I am still I have a wave of fear rush over me that something will happen to him. He's always been the quiet sensible one of the kids. He's the one who rolls with the punches, doesn't over react and although he caught our yard on fire one fall he's been a breeze to raise so far.

When I am busy and running like crazy he's always somewhere in the background waiting for me to slow down. When Im quiet and calm he's there. I often have to remind myself to stop and be quiet and enjoy him. I am so thankful for him in more ways than I could even know. As I count my blessings he is one of the big ones. He will always be my baby, I call him "the baby" and no matter how big he grows, he'll always be my mama's boy.

Be still and be thankful

Thankful (kid2)

There is no way to put my emotions into words over my first little precious baby girl. Right now is an emotional time between her and I. She has flown the coop… moved on… and as a mother I had no idea how hard that would be. I had dreams of her growing up, going off to college, visiting her… I knew I'd miss her but I had no idea how much.

With Kid1, I wanted a girl so bad I could barely stand it. When I got pregnant with Kid2, Mr. Be and I decided to not find out her gender. We were SO patient, I would never be able to do it now. I was scared, I had decided that I only knew how to raise boys and I was sure that I was totally unprepared for a girl.

I WAS RIGHT. I don't think there is a way to prepare for a daughter. Yes, yes, we had the pink nightgowns, rosy blankets and clothes out the wazoo, but it turns out that raising a daughter is WAY more than looking cute and combing long golden locks.

Just about every decision I've made since having a daughter, I have wondered how it would affect her. How will it affect her if I wear makeup every single day? Will she feel like God didn't make me pretty enough? What about my weight (which I am terrible at), if I complain about my weight every single day and still do nothing (which I do) will she mirror my failing body image? What about words? Will I use the wrong words at everything I say and will she use them as she grows? What about advice? Will I be able to advise her properly? The answer to all of the above questions is no. I now know that I will guide her in all the wrong ways, say things I shouldn't and she will repeat them, feel fat and pass it on and give her a love of all things makeup.

I don't think there is a proper way to prepare for having a daughter but I do know this. Be still. Be still and listen to God, he will guide you and if you will be still enough to listen you will do a far better job that I could ever dream of. I wasn't still enough to listen.

I can't imagine a day without her, she is my rock, my friend, my beautiful first daughter. I wouldn't change a single thing about her, as she grows and learns that all my advice is bunk she'll turn out great!

Be still and be thankful.

Thankful (kid1)

I know I have written these words or many like them before, the words about becoming a mother, the words about seeing my first child for the first time, holding him, and feeling his warmth. His first breath, his first cry, his first kick that he didn't meet my womb. He was stunning to me and as you may know he took my last breath as a non mother away. The second I saw him, I took a deep breath and little did I know my world was forever changed.

I wish I could go back in time and seize that moment, remember it better, pay closer attention. I was overwhelmed, he wasn't the color I thought he should be, he felt heavy on my weary chest… I watched him and he watched me, we stared at each other and I had no idea how my life would change. I couldn't know that my world would come crashing down over and over and how I would beg God to help me be a better mother, person and wife just for him. I wouldn't be able to wrap my mind around the worry, hurt and terror that is raising a child.

I love him. I feel like I've loved him forever and ever. I couldn't have known that I would feel that way. He has given me so much love, so many firsts, so many lessons. There isn't a way to thank him for being mine but I'd give my life for him.

Be still and be thankful.

thankful (Mr B.)

I am thankful for my husband and I haven't said it enough. It's hard to say when you're not paying attention what it is that your thankful for. Mr. B. and I have been married for many many years but not always together in our hearts. I am positive that we took each other for granted at least a thousand and half times over the years. We have been separated by time, miles and heart aches. I know that I am thankful for him, I know that I am, but it has taken me many years to get here. I got still and got thankful.

Be Still and be thankful.