Be still… (for L)

I was going crazy last year. I thought I had all the knowledge in the world, I thought I had it all figured out. Last year my world came crashing down via my own hands, heart and soul. I reached and begged for advice from anyone who would listen and I received the most amazing advice over and over. Sometimes I listened, sometimes I didn't. Sometimes I turned and ran another direction because I was so scared. Sometimes I ran towards great advice. My whole world rested in a low valley and it was a hard pill to swallow. I was in love with ideas and my mind was in the clouds. I have come to the brilliant resolution that I know N.O.T.H.I.N.G. And you know what? Im okay with it. I don't want all the answers.

I reached out to someone very dear to me and she told me to "BE STILL". At first this made no sense to me… Be still? How could I "be still" when my life was whirling away? I couldn't stop. I couldn't stop begging, moving, running, doing, searching, crying… and all of a sudden, I was still. I stopped looking, I stopped searching, I stopped running, I stopped asking and I closed my eyes. I remember the moment. I was standing in the shower, I closed my eyes and I was still. I stood there and let the warm water run over me and I was still. I stood there, just me and for the first time in so long I had a wave of peace over me. I let my tears fall, I let my hurts go, I let the promises that I couldn't keep wash down the drain… I was still.

I don't have any advice, I don't have any ideas, I don't know whats best for anyone but I know that if you'll "BE STILL", there is peace. It's peace like a river, peace like leaves whistling through the trees on a cool quiet day. There is peace inside of you, I can promise you this.

I work to "BE STILL" on a daily basis. I'm not always successful. One day at a time, one minute at a time, one second at a time I remind myself to "BE STILL".

Psalms 46:10